Seminar: Art Malov on Day Game (Review & Notes Included)

Overview

On Sunday, August 24, 2008, Art Malov, a NYC Dating Coach, spoke at the NYC Inside Out Social Dynamics Mastermind Group’s monthly Meetup. The seminar’s topic was Day Game and Inner Game. While Art’s teachings diverge in some areas from my own, I did find the seminar very interesting. Below are the notes I took from the seminar. These notes reflect my interpretation of what Art Malov said and is not a reflection of my own personal views on Day Game and Inner Game.


The Approach

Most men care too much about what the girl thinks or is concerned with what her response will be. You need to not care what the girl thinks or what her response will be; anytime you come up with reasons why you cannot approach a girl it is merely an excuse and you need to be conscious of it and overcome it.

When you approach women, 50% of those women will be available, the other 50% will be unavailable. Unavailable can mean the girl has a boyfriend, she is in some form of relationship, a family member is ill, her dog just died, she is late paying the rent—basically any situation that puts her in a state that would make her unavailable for a new man to enter into her life. When a woman is unavailable she will either not be responsive or respond in short answers. If you realize the woman is unavailable or the interaction is not fun to you, eject immediately. The goal is for you to have fun, you are the prize. The other 50% of women will be available and will most likely engage you; it may not even make sense why.

Do not follow or chase after girls. This gives a chasing mentality. There are plenty of girls and no need to chase any down. Girls walking directly towards you are the hardest type of approaches.

The Opener and Interaction

A day game interaction should last between 5 – 10 minutes. A number close can be accomplished in under a minute simply by creating an emotional connection with the girl alone. It is not logical, but it works.

Do not use direct compliment openers. Girls get complimented all the time, especially if they are very attractive and direct compliments reveal to the girl that you are interested which releases tension and gives the girl power over you. The girl should not be aware you will number close until you do so. It is best to use situational openers. Always have a “backup opener.” A backup opener is an opener you use if nothing comes to mind for you to say when you approach a girl.
When you open, do not face her too early. You should kino the girl, but do not do it too much. In day game the conversation should be 50/50, not 90/10 like in night game. If the girl is not responding, she is not interested, eject. There is no need to continue to plow. In day game, if a girl tells you she has a boyfriend she is most likely telling you that she is not interested. You need to generally enter into rapport sometime in the interaction, but not right in the beginning. Avoid asking her too many questions, sometimes 2-3 are already too many.

The goal should be for a number close, not to go on instant-dates. Just tell her the two of you should hang out sometime and hand her your phone. If you do not remember her name, ask her to spell it.

If the girl is wearing head phones, do not signal for her to remove the head phones, instead speak to her. If she does not hear you, project louder. If you have to, you can tap her on the shoulder. Avoid signaling her to take off her headphones because it will be telling her to do something and if she does do it, it won’t be of her own accord.

Phone Game and Day 2s

Call a day or two after you number close. Do not go for an e-mail close. Don’t text-message the girl initially. When you call, if the girl does not pick up and you get the voice mail box, hang up and immediately call back again. If the girl does not pick up on the second call, leave a short message.

Keep the first date short and can occur on the weekend or during the week.

Further Resources on Art Malov

Art Malov's Dating Coach Company
Art Malov's Blog
Art Malov's Wingman Group
Art Malov's Book, Park Bench Dating
YouTube Videos Featuring Art Malov
PUA Ratings Audio Interview with Art Malov
New York Times Article, Wingmen in the Wings

2 comments:

Franje

September 12, 2008 at 11:55 PM

Hi Yummy, could you please tell me which PUA you think has the best day game material?


What do you think of Xuma's and Malov's material?

Yummy Stale Bread

September 19, 2008 at 7:06 PM

I think for in depth material covering Day Game, Pickup 101 by far produces the best products. Besides Pickup 101, I have felt that David Wygant gives excellent advice on day game.